The metro ones are my favorite (if you couldn't tell already! hehe)
On the Orange Line train to New Carrollton, stopped at Foggy Bottom station
Train conductor on loudspeaker: "To the person who has their foot stuck in the train door, I saw you run down the escalator and place your foot in the closing door. This is not the train for you."
DC is fucking perfect... don't believe me? Read my blog. Check out my "about me" to learn more about me (duh!) and ask as many questions about DC as you want! And of course, submit anything! I post everything I receive. Enjoy! :)